The following is a letter sent from Miss me to my dear friend ANNIE
Dearest Annie,
Please forgive me for my delayed response. Your email filled my heart with much delight. You have a gift of words. I felt as if I was transported into a past Century. Where letters were filled with words that had deep meaning, each Intentionally placed. Your ideas were perfectly and smoothly communicated.
You as well, have a very special place in my heart. You are filled with wonder and I love it. From the sounds of it, you are not only seeing but experiencing the world.
Your letter stated,"
I want to be in places where you are forced to confront so many parts of the human experience."
This line resonated with me. One of the deepest Joys I felt on my mission, have not been in the Glorious highs or the Comfortable evenings. On the contrary, they have been in moments of uncertainty, grief, and aching.
A past experience comes to mind.
A moment when an elderly woman requested a blessing.
We drove down into what was once a vibrant, booming and blooming city.
The houses whisper that they, like the people who once lived there, had big hopes and dreams.
The store front streets and homes are lined with the remnants of Victorian Masonry- Now derelict tenement. The occasional store front with a "Now open" sign sticks out as a sign of Hope.
As I made my way off the freeway and walked into a Victorian style house in the center of a rundown city. You find the collapsing ceilings and broken floors and a man shaking while laying on a cot. The house is littered with cobwebs.
The elderly lady Comforts her incoherent and shaking husband.
She seems so calm.
This is her normal,
completely different than mine.
She has joy that we are there and faith that he will be healed.
Her deepest desire is to return and partake of Sacrament with her ward family- yet she is unable to ever leave her ill husband unattended.
The body that lays on the cot is almost unrecognizable as compared to the man featured in the few pictures shabby taped to the empty wall.
The few old pictures tell a story.
A middle aged smiling man who is holding his wife. They stand infront in front of a table full of food. Surrounded with them are 5 young men in white shirts, simple ties and black name tags. The joy in the picture is almost palpable. Just adjacent to this picture is one of the Temple. Although deeply faded the Temple's message still shines brightly. Little further down a newspaper article and lastly a wedding picture and one more with the missionaries that they feel gave them the greast gift, life itself.
My attention was drawn back to the dear sister in front of me. Her English was broken. As I said a prayer I blessd the home through the power and authority of my calling the elders then administered a blessing of healing. As we share a scripture in Mark. I contemplated on the fact that the same power which in a grand scale was used to create he universe was now being used to administer on a small scale to individual child of God.
God's power has no limit.
It transcended any earthly label we may put on things.
Being uncomfortably confronted to all walks of life forces one to realize the immensity of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
It's often times hard to truly understand everything that the saviors Atonement covers because often times we only understand what we experience in our own life. How am I able to understand the infirmities that He takes upon Himself when we only think about our own? We may subconsciously acknowledge that he takes on the infirmities of all. But do I internalize it?
I'm so Grateful when Jesus Christ allows me have a glimpse of His Atoning power. When for a moment I get to walk step by step, sit side by side, cry tear by tear, embrace hug by hug and see for just a moment a small portion of what pain,love and Joy Jesus Christ took upon himself. I will never fully comprehend what others, including this dear sister has gone through. But like you said. Your soul craves to be confronted with the opportunity to understand all Human experiences. I.might change the last phrase to ( opportunity to excepeince how the the Atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ applies to us and all..
How and in what ways do we experience these moments? We must experience service to experience Jesus Christs power. I know that our dear beloved Prophet invited us to minister to the one. I know he did this so we can understand the type of power that Jesus Christ holds. So we can understand that he truly can sucker us in our times of deepest needs.
Genuine service requires that we look beyond ourselves. It requires that we do more than just say hello but that we seek to truly understand another human. It requires us to be uncomfortable. Genuine service is oftentimes initially inconvenient , untimely, and uncomfortable. Service never comes at a convenient time .if it wasn’t a sacrifice it wouldn’t make us grown We serve so that we can understand. I've often said recently that we act and talk to seek to understand.
However after this experience I've come to know it's a little more deep than that.
We don’t seek to understand simply so that we can know what they feel, but so that we can know what the Savior was and is capable and willing to feel for all of us. A life without genuine personal service is a life without knowing Christ's true character. It's a life without an understanding of the atonement of Jesus Christ.
A poem
I will never forget that hot summer day in Stockton California.
The day when sweat and Tears dripped down my face.
The day I felt Jesus Christ redeeming grace.
The day when worries, fears and cares were erased through his garden prayer.
Forever grateful I am for her.
I say I'm grateful for this change.
This change in perspective on how I bear
one another's burdens now with much more care.
Now I remember the Savior's blood
Drop.by drop
For me He bled
So on this day I look back to the day we're sweating tears trip down my face on thay day Jesus Christ taught me clearly
That athough they greatly fearing his body ripping on the cross and tearing there no need to fear that extra nail
For even that he will be able tell
Those who knew him and drew close by or those who faltered and took no side
But now I can say I know him dearly
I've felt those nail prints very clearly
And with those hands that felt them clearly I wiped her tears very dearly
I know my savior and he knows me
as I've ministered and see as he sees. That hot Stockton day helped pave the way
for the beginning of a new chapter
a chapter filled with lifelong genuine service
So with my baptismal and Temple Covenants
I look forward to a life of fulfillment
I know it won't be filled with comfortable evenings but I hope it's filled with lots of serving
Anyways, your email just caused me to do some serious reflection so keep for that. It sounds like you've made quite the adventures around Europe
What do work stays look like for you?
Sending much love
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